Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Time's up already?

Below was written a few weeks ago and I've left in all of the typing mistakes and added some corrections to show you that I can't type as fast as my mind will think.  I tell myself I want to be a writer but suffer from writer's block and perfectionist punctuation issues.  This is what came out...

Fifteen minutes a day...that's all it takes.  I'm supposed to just write about whatever is on my mind and just keep writing for 15 minuts.  I have too many thoughts for that and I cant't type that fast and it's hard to not stop for spelling mistakes because I am a wee bit of a perfectionist.  I'm already making mistakes and trying to change them.  Blank....still blank. I can't fix my mistakes. I...blamk.  All I can think abou is my run to the finihs line at the Johhnny Miles race.  I go tto the end near the end with about 1 km lef tand I had told Paula who was running with me the whole way that tmy plan was to get to the turn around pint and take our pace up a nothch to a 5:30 pace to finihs.  I didn't know if I could do it because I was tired tired tired and my legs the quads were feekking (feeling) klike they would lock up at any time,  Ihad thought earlier about hitting the wall and wondering if that happensd to half marathon runners.  I thought I couldn't do that becussd hat (because that) was only for marathoners and I'm not one so therefore I could not hit the wall. I wasn't even going to come close. I would not hit the  wall.  We were on trxack to hit a 2:10 half naarathon and we were going to do ti.  When we got the bridge and up the metal grate and under, i hit the huge pipe and a tall person might have to  duck for. Up we wen t onto the gracel (gravel) that took us onto the path along the river to our turn around opiutn (point).  That was hard.  my legs were burning.  I ran it though and took long steps and pucshe (pushed) it to hit the uphill with pride. Pauls (Paula) nad I ketp going, she was looking like more of a runner than I was and I was hoping that she wasn't being as negative in her mind as I was and I couldn't talk to her because I knew I waould say  soemthing negative which I didn't need to pass on to her.  We kept going and goping, eventually we saw my sister, Debbie and she was looking tiredbut still running liek a tropoper (trooper).  Shwe wasn' that far ahead of us, I deceided.  If I could keep thispace, I might even catch upt  ot her, especially if we can do our pace pick up after the turn around point.
When I finally saw rhat poster board, Paila was ahead of me by a few steps and we made the utrn and suddenly it was downhill.  Ok Paula, lets pick it up.  I realaly had to convince my self and as I examined my waych, I said to her with a pissed off voice that Shit we missed our 2:10 finish.  I had miscalculated oiur time.  Damn.  I was ready to quite and then Paula's little voice said that we were going to come close to oru 2:10.  for whatever reason, I believed her.  Not much of me but I was kicking myself inside for somehow missing a minute miscalculation a minute of the race. we had been so close but we really did each take  a pee break, and I had to stop many times for water breaks, weven ifg they were for only 15 seconds. It's not (like) we really stopped moving to have a drink.
My mind had to get off the negaticve thought so I needed to think about the finihs,. I needed to think about my training runs. How did I keep going when my sister and sister in law were biking beside me as I ran? I thought about mty dance pace so I started counting.  1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8.  1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8.  this was my cadence.  it was a fast pace and I still can hear it in my head...1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8.  1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8.  I couldn't think of my legs, I couldn't look at anything but te fact taht I was crossing the line and Paula was a few steps behind me.  i wanted her to keep my pace but I couldn't push her to do it and I wasn't sure I could keep it up.  1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8.  Over the bridge and people were cheering me on.  i saw the lady ahead of me making the turn and someone told me that it was just a few more feet to the finsh.  I had to keep that pace through this last street.  1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8.  1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8.  Just keep moving.  As I crossed the first mat, I then heard my name over the speakers.  GWYN BELLEFONTIAINE of th ISLAND GIRLS from Rpince Edward ISland.  he saidf my name right!  And he knew that I was one of the Island Girls!  1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8!  I remembered to smile and I raiesed my arms in vicotry and crossed the finish line in stride with a huger smile.  I hope they got that picture because I do'nt really want t he agony to show. 
As i slowed to a walk, i strated to get dizzy and closed my eyes and let the man talk to me and someone put a red ribbon with a medal over my head.  He suggested I sit but there was no way I could sit at this point.  I heard Paula's name over the loudspeaker and inside I cheered her victory.  Not only that, I was grateful to her for getting me to the finihs line.  If I hadn't been running with her, I probably would have walked the whole thing and gave up like a spoiled rotten kid and sulked the whole way home.  Thanks again Paula.  Great race. 

turns out our final race times were 2:11:13 and 2:11:18.  Only a minute off our mark.  Only one pee break away, only 4 water breaks.  If only I could run with a full bladder or if only I wasn't telling myself that I was thristy.  I wasn't thirsty, I was tortallly hydrated from the previous night's drinking water. 

All's well though.  As disappointed as i think I am, I still finihsed my third half marathon in better time than ever, a personal best for me.  Now I just need to concentrate on the next run....Harvest Fest 25K, Here i come!!!

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